Today while shopping at Costco I stepped away (for a second) from my cart loaded with apparently highly-desired goods and some asshole stole my cart. In exchange said asshole left me their cart with a box of cookies and a pack of Clorox Wipes. Obviously I am a much better shopper and my stuff was very good but that’s not a reason to steal my cart. I circled the store trying to identify aforementioned asshole or my abandoned cart but found neither and had to start my shopping all over. While hoping that the cart thief will choke on the fresh ripe pineapple I so lovingly picked, I came up with the title which I thought was pretty clever and that’s why I am writing this post. On the second look the title is not so clever but I already typed it so read it anyway. You better not be eating pineapple…
Why wouldn’t this happen to me instead?

UPDATE: I wasn’t robbed, my cart was taken before I paid, so I had to start over. Still pissed me off.