The infamous portal to the netherworld, otherwise known as a pothole located next to the property tax-free oasis on the Admiral Street in Kansas City, Mo has finally been dealt with. It has entered the fifth and final stage of the pothole life-cycle: the metal plate cover-up (other stages are: birth, neglect, warning sign, and barricade). The metal plate is a permanent stage and no further development is expected.

The plate is artfully decorated with custom lettering where the top line reads “K.C.W.D” and the the bottom line can only be read with a mirror.

To quote the musical Oklahoma:

Ev’rythin’s up to date in Kansas City
They’ve gone about as fur as they c’n go!

Update: Always resourceful Hyperblogal suggests putting clown cozies on the metal plates to brighten up our streets a little.

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Muslim Magomaev, one of the most popular Soviet singers of the 60’s, 70’s and 80’s died today. It wouldn’t be an overstatement to say that 100% of the Soviet population knew and loved him. He was a huge star with a wide range of musical talents – from pop to opera, performing in many languages and winning many well-deserved international awards. Many times when Magomaev was on TV my Father would record his songs on our reel-to-reel tape recorder and little 6-year old me would sing along.

I always thought he was old, only 66…

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It’s no surprise that I find a lot in common with people 30 year older than me – we share similar memories. But since I am physically not old enough to retire to a front porch where I’d whittle and chase kids off my lawn, occasionally telling educational “in my day…” stories to anyone who would listen, I have to resort to occasionally posting these stories on this here blog. Just like it says in these unfunny pictures old(er) women share on Facebook: “age is nothing but a number”, and my number is 67. I wish the Social Security would agree.

In my day we didn’t go to physicals, the physicals came to us…

…and while the entire class and Lenin himself were watching, the annual health inspection would commence.

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There can’t be a Russian meal without a loaf of bread. Nowadays, with everyone trying to lose weight, bread may not be as essential as it used to be but if you have bread in the house you won’t go hungry. I survived two years in the army by eating mostly bread and butter and whatever edible bits I could find in the crappy food we were given; the bread was always fresh and delicious. I have a 92-year old aunt who will not sit down for a meal without some bread; that comes from living through the war, evacuations, bread rationing and hunger.

I wrote about bread before. Luckily, after years of substandard “wonder” bread, bread-baking is making a comeback in this country as it should. Many people responded to the recent Donna’s post about baking bread. What do I have in common with a lady who lived all of her life on the farm? We bake bread! The commonality ended when she wrote about breeding a cow, but still…

I posted this recipe before ,it was published in Cooks Illustrated some time ago. but this time it will be illustrated and the bread will be rye – even better for you. It apparently promotes weight loss, so I ate about half-a-loaf yesterday hoping to lose a lot of weight.

To start, you will need to assemble these simple ingredients:

• 3 cups of flour (15 ounces) consisting of 8 oz of unbleached all-purpose flour and 7oz of Rye flour, plus additional for dusting work surface.
• 1/4 teaspoon instant or rapid-rise yeast
• 1 1/2 teaspoons table salt
• 3/4 cup plus 2 tablespoons water (7 ounces), at room temperature
• 1/4 cup plus 2 tablespoons mild-flavored lager (that would be beer for you- unsophisticated readers)
• 1 tablespoon white vinegar

You will also need a large-size cast iron pot or Dutch oven. If you feel like throwing away close to two hundred dollars for a fancy one, be my guest (literally, be my guest), I bought mine for $23.

I also recommend getting a scale. It can have multiple uses in the household especially if you are dealing drugs.

1. Whisk flour, yeast, and salt in large bowl. Add water, beer, and vinegar. Using rubber spatula, fold mixture, scraping up dry flour from bottom of bowl until shaggy ball forms.

Cover bowl with plastic wrap and let sit at room temperature for 8 to 18 hours; I let it sit overnight and even longer. I usually put it in the oven with an oven light turned on to keep it warm. Here is another important step: if you followed directions you should have 9 ounces of perfectly good beer left in the bottle. If you are a gentleman – finish it, if you are a lady – yell at this lazy no-good domestic partner of yours to come make himself useful and finish this nasty beer. If you don’t have anyone to yell at or your domestic partner is another lady, just go ahead and drink it yourself, no reason to waste a good product. Now relax, you are done for the day.

2. Lay 12- by 18-inch sheet of parchment paper inside 10-inch skillet and spray with nonstick cooking spray. Transfer dough to lightly floured work surface and knead 10 to 15 times. Shape dough into ball by pulling edges into middle. Transfer dough, seam-side down, to parchment-lined skillet and spray surface of dough with nonstick cooking spray. Parchment and Wax paper may look similar  but they are not the same, do not use wax paper or you bread will taste like you are sucking on a candle.

Cover loosely with plastic wrap and let rise at room temperature until dough has doubled in size and does not readily spring back when poked with finger, about 2 hours.

Time for another beer.

3. About 30 minutes before baking, adjust oven rack to lowest position, place 6- to 8-quart heavy-bottomed Dutch oven (with lid) on rack, and heat oven to 500 degrees. Lightly flour top of dough and, using razor blade or sharp knife, make one 6-inch-long, 1/2-inch-deep slit along top of dough.

Carefully remove pot from oven and remove lid. Pick up dough by lifting parchment overhang and lower into pot (let any excess parchment hang over pot edge). Cover pot and place in oven. Reduce oven temperature to 425 degrees and bake covered for 30 minutes.

Remove lid and continue to bake until loaf is deep brown and instant-read thermometer inserted into center registers 210 degrees, 20 to 30 minutes longer.

Carefully remove bread from pot; transfer to wire rack and cool to room temperature, about 2 hours.

Now, if actually waited for 2 hours (I admire your patience)  you can finally slice your bread and spread some real butter on it, maybe a pinch of salt of you feel adventurous.

Eat is slow, crunchy crust, warm crumb, amazing smell…

Here is a clip from a very famous 1949 movie Kubanskie Kazaki about the joy and excitement of wheat harvesting  at the collective farm.

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Preface:

Haphazard, light-on-planning style of travel we practice is not for everyone. Before leaving on the summer trip to Europe I haven’t done a lot of research, instead I directed my kid to find and write down everything she wants to see and do, while I would take care of the travel arrangements. So upon arrival, when I asked her what’s on her list for London, she said “Everything!”. That and Nando’s Chicken. And that’s exactly what we did.

Tourists roam Europe with textbook-sized travel guides constantly checking if they are doing it right. Someone on a large travel forum suggested taking a course in French gastronomy before visiting France. That’s in addition to a basic French language course and an overview of the French history. Visitors start their days with detailed and perfectly timed itineraries. A little more planning probably would’ve helped us to see more, save a bit of money and not show up at Versailles on the only day when it’s closed and leave the visit to Louvre for the day when its art gets a day off. People with a plan don’t have to wonder if they will have to sleep at a railway station because their credit card was declined when they tried to buy a train ticket at the last minute using a WIFI they found at a random Starbucks. People who didn’t spend their pre-trip days posting funny photos on Facebook don’t miss their stop on the way to the airport.

And then there are people like us, who get up every morning with just a faint idea where to go, or, sometimes, only a direction. We are the ones wondering around trying to make sense out of a souvenir map. We are the ones taking trams in the wrong direction all the way to the final stop wondering why our hotel is not there. We are the ones eating Mexican food in Amsterdam where the restaurant owner proudly calls it Argentinian, but which turns out to be neither. There is something to be said about spontaneity and sense of adventure, and we are the ones saying it. Loudly.

Don’t try this unless you are sure you won’t be divorced, disowned or dumped.

Face:

When God created London he said to the English people:

I will give you an awe-inspiring mix of the best architecture in the world,

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