Best Blogger

Kansas City With the Russian Accent

Kansas City With the Russian Accent, at kcmeesha.com, is the Web journal of a Russian Jewish expatriate who came to Kansas City in 1992. Meesha V. outwrites half the local native-English-speaking bloggers and outcharms most of the others with an original voice and smart, funny asides and observations that could occur only to a cultural latecomer. It doesn’t hurt that the anonymous author kicked off the first entry with jokes about the Iron Curtain and a repudiation of deeply unfunny Russian comic Yakov Smirnoff. Documenting life in Kansas City, Meesha also tells some pretty harrowing stories about growing up during the Soviet era, including the anxiety and fear he confronted during his mandatory induction into the Russian army at age 18, waiting to find out if he’d be stationed near his home or sent to Afghanistan. With one foot in the metro and one in Rossiyskaya Federatsiya, Kcmeesha.com is Kansas City’s best blog this year.

Wow! I am at a loss of words (it’s not that hard for me). I didn’t know that I was even being considered. I am not going to deny that this was a pleasant surprise. I don’t really think I am the best; it’s just that while much better bloggers switched to twittering one-liners I am still here typing away, mostly because I am too cheap to pay for the internet for my phone. I would like to thank many people who read this blog and especially the ones who collectively left over 1,700 comments over the past year. I know it’s not that many and The Readers’ Choice Best Blogger TKC (Congratulations, Tony!) gets that many in a day, but I appreciate every one of you who took the time to comment, participate in a poll or a caption contest, thanks for not being anonymous. I would like especially to thank XO because this site is more or less an extension of my comments on his blog almost a year ago. Many other bloggers who are linked here and even more in my Reader serve as the daily inspiration and also as my imaginary friends. Meeting and corresponding with many of you over the past year made worthwhile all the time that I spend in front of my laptop, 10 lbs of gained weight and no personal life.

This honor just goes to prove that the American Dream is still there for anyone who wants it, it just changed a little. Yes, I got here dreaming about owning a mansion, nice cars, maybe a yacht with a beach house and a small private plane; I got none of these things, and yet I can’t complain: having all this would have made me just another one of many rich people with awesome, care-free, amazing lives full of leisure, travel and entertainment. Instead, I am one of a few, but few of the best.

Thanks!

The secret of the mystery billboard was finally revealed:

Readers of this blog submitted far better captions than the underwhelming A/C advertisement from the company which is famous for annoying the radio listeners with various renditions of its jingle. I may not be an expert on puns but if you used  “hot wife-hot wife” combination, doesn’t it follow that your wife will be less hot when you fix the A/C and it’s in your best interest to keep the A/C not working or you would have to go back to seeing you plain ol’ not hot wife? By the way, the caption contest is open for another week.

I saw this sign yesterday:

I wonder who is the ad-wizard who came up with this one? At the time when “unusual banking” already helped you lose your job, your house, your savings and pension, maybe some usual banking is in order now? Like the kind the doesn’t bankrupt the country. Just an idea.
Lastly, things like this never get old (sorry for the quality, I recorded this from my TV screen):

httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ebqvm9Nvv90

Update: I forgot that I had this photo of a t-shirt in the window of a local religious-supply store:

Here we see the Lord doing push-ups in his own gym with the cross representing “the sin of the world” on his back. The caption “bench press this” is confusing unless the t-shirt is hanging upside-down, then the Lord would be lying on the cross and bench-pressing the rock. I am just saying: Lord would know the difference between the push-up and bench-press, that’s all.

Some of you might have noticed that I mostly retired from writing about restaurants, not that it was a large part of this blog anyway. There are many food blogs out there, ranging from awesome to annoying (no links here), and even more reviews posted on a variety of special sites, so I have no interest in being just another one. However, sometimes I find something new, exciting and not beaten to death by everyone with a smartphone and a greasy finger, something that I feel needs to be shared. A while ago I wrote about my favorite hot dog dealer vendor Clay’s Curbside Grill and today’s post is about the Indios Carbonsitos – a Mexican food truck roaming the neighborhoods in Kansas City, KS and the only one I know of (could be wrong) to be registered on the Kansas side.

I first learned about Indios from a comment on one of the Fat City posts and tracked down their twitter and facebook pages. From there on, it was a just a matter of time before I got my hands on and in one of their tortas ahogadas.

You might have noticed more activity than usual on this here blog and it’s not because I am less lazy, but because the time is running out and I have less than a month to say everything I’ve ever wanted to say.

This fine specimen of the religious billboard art is located around Truman Rd. and HWY 71. Notice a Bible Seal of Approval at the top left and a person in the position painfully familiar to anyone who ever used a squat toilet at the bottom right.

In any case, I suggest you repent soon, use up your vacation and deplete your savings accounts.

You have been warned.

This recipe is really easy and results in a spread or a dip, name it as you wish. Eggplant is delicious and good for you in a variety of ways including weight loss:

Don’t include too many eggplants in your diet if you’re interested in: Weight gain.

In other words, if you stay with the eggplant diet you will finally be able to attain that figure you were dreaming about, all the while consuming tasty eggplant recipes.

This recipe contains 2 eggplants, dill, garlic and mayonnaise – if you don’t like these ingredients separately or in combination, please move along.

Remove green ends from the eggplants and place them in a pot of boiling salted water.

Sometime during the cooking process try to turn the eggplants over, they will resist and try to flip back, one of you will eventually win, hopefully not the eggplant. You may want to use the lid for that purpose. Check periodically,when a toothpick goes through the eggplant without much effort, they are done. Time depends on the size and shape of your eggplant (if you know what I mean) but definitely over 20 minutes. Just keep checking. Remove from the pot. The next step is to press the eggplant. Place a cooling rack into the sink. Cut multiple slits into the skin of the eggplant lengthwise.

You need some weight to extract as much moisture out of the eggplant as you can. One possible way to do it is to place a cutting board on top of the eggplant and weigh it down with a pot of water.

Two hours later the eggplant should look fairly flat.

I use the meat grinder to chop the eggplant, you can use the food processor, just don’t pulverize it, you are not making toothpaste, it should retain texture. Add plenty of chopped dill, a little mayonnaise and as much garlic as you deem appropriate. Some salt and pepper to taste.

The final product looks like this and can be consumed with crackers or bread, in sandwiches, or on its own.

Warning: In case of extreme weight loss please discontinue.