Care and safety of women during camping trips is an important subject that’s often overlooked. If your woman looks good, other men will try to steal her away from you. She may also use the outdoors, your relaxed state and heavy alcohol intake to escape. There are multiple other dangers lurking in the seemingly peaceful wooded and lake areas. To avoid potential pitfalls it’s best to tie your woman to a heavy unmovable object such as a tree or a post:
The type of the knot you use is very important: some women are crafty and will untie an easy knot before you know it. Remember your boyscout years; here is some detail from the photo above:
If you have a young child, place him on a tree with the rifle in clear view of your woman as an extra precaution:
After your woman is secured you can finally proceed to do what camping is really all about: getting drunk, ogling other untied women and trying not to lose your brand new boat.
This safety tip was brought to you by:
Truck Antlers: Don’t Be A Schmuck, Turn You Truck Into A Buck!
Additional financing by:
Giant Fish-Looking Mailboxes: Who Is A Pussy Now? I Am Talking To You, You God Damn Mailman Son-Of-A-Bitch!
Hah..I thought of XO when I saw the boy manikin with the gun in the KIDS section. Now I have a mental image of XO with antlers sticking out of his jeep .. lol
I totally understand the desire to put antlers on one’s truck, but $29.99?
I bet they were worth more than that to the deer
We’ve never been in the local Bass Pro Shop. The parking lot always looks so crowded when we pass, and we’ve seen the one at Springfield many times. Everything is overpriced and we don’t hunt or fish.
When we were camping once in awhile, we’d sometimes find something unique for camping out that you don’t find just anywhere, but our camping-out phase is behind us.
While these are wonderful photos, we should note that the ‘female’ manikin is incorrectly bound. Proper form is described below:
1.) As a matter of course she should be nude,
2.) And, of course, kneeling;
3.) Head bowed…
What? I’m sorry; you didn’t say this was a family blog…
Now I have to instruct daughter to avoid men driving antlered trucks containing only rope and a lawn chair. Life is toooooo complicated.
Wow, no wonder the store in Independence is always packed. I didn’t KNOW the info they were spreading.
You have truly brought about the spirit of camping. Let me take my woman with me during camping